Peaceful Divorce

Fifteen or twenty years ago, the norm was, “I want to get divorced, and there’s only one way. We go to court. We both find attorneys, whether we talk about it or battle it, and we go to court.” I think today we have a new norm, and the new norm today is that there are different alternative dispute resolutions out there. We have mediation, we have collaborative, we have arbitration, and then a model that we’re working in called integrated divorce. The most cost effective way is that the parties can sit at the kitchen table and talk about it and make agreements, but if they make an error in the process it can be costly to them.

In the models that I work in, we use coaches, financial neutrals, and attorneys. They can go out and hire a coach to help with the parenting plan, and they can hire a financial neutral to help with the financials, and then give it to the attorneys to be drawn up into legal documents. Clients that are willing to use one of these models are the clients that this process works well for.

Does this process work for every single couple? No, I don’t think it does. I think that if one party has injured the other, for example the emotional pain of infidelity, a divorce is harder to stomach because there’s anger and strong emotion. But I’m seeing more and more clients whose children are graduating high school and leaving for college, and mom and dad are deciding, “You know, we really haven’t been happy, so we’ve done our job of raising the kids, of getting them through. Now let’s get divorced, but let’s do it the way we want to do it, and not do it the way somebody says we have to.” Those are the type of clients that I think work best for me.

Click here to read the rest of the article.

Views: 15


You need to be a member of Peaceful Divorce to add comments!

Join Peaceful Divorce

Become an affiliate of the Happily Divorced! book and audio program! Let Reformed "Killer" Divorce Attorney, Cynthia Tiano, and Dr. Max Vogt, Marriage and Family Psychologist, take you on an adventure into the lives of two families going through the divorce legal system - one doing "legal battle" and the other creating a "peaceful divorce". Learn how to create a Win-Win from their experiences...


Latest Activity

Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

What is Hidden in the New Tax Proposal That Could Change Divorce

Deep in the 429 pages of the House Republican tax bill is a provision with financial consequences for couples getting divorced.People looking to get divorced and people writing alimony checks would have to pay tax on those payments. Under current tax law, alimony payments are tax-deductible to the party paying and taxable to the party receiving them. Under the new proposal that would end.Here is the rationale for making these changes: The proposal would eliminate what is effectively a divorce…See More
Dec 6
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

Tax Tips for the Recently Divorced

We are only 10 weeks away from the end of the year. What does that mean for people who have gotten divorced in 2017?It means you have to get ready to file your tax returns for the year ending 2017 by April 16, 2018 (April 15 falls on a Sunday so you can file your return on April 16) or extend it. Remember, just because you extend it, you still have to pay any…See More
Nov 16
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

Tax Q&A for Recently Divorced People

Divorce is one of the most painful experiences anyone can go through. In addition to the emotional component, financial issues weigh heavily on the minds of the parties to any divorce. Unfortunately, there are just some things that don’t follow any logic and you just have to know. Here are a few of the most common:  What filing status options do I have if I am separated from my spouse? You may qualify as Head of Household if you and…See More
Oct 25
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

New Models of Mediation

When I got trained in mediation, we were told that you either did solo mediation (one mediator) or co-mediation (two mediators). Since then, divorce professionals have learned that there are endless permutations of effective methods to mediate. In this post, I describe a few of the arrangements I have encountered in the 30 years I have been doing this.Integrated Mediation is…See More
Oct 4




© 2017   Created by Cynthia Tiano, Esq..   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service