Peaceful Divorce

The Internet opens worlds for us all, but for unhappily married folks, it opens up some dangers as well. People get divorced for many reasons, and this is an ancient truth. Anger, alcohol, hurt, coldness, money problems and infidelity are some of the most common. The Internet does not cause these problems by can accelerate some of them.

For instance, there are countless people in cyberspace who could be your lover. In the old days, meeting a person and having an affair was not that easy. The world was very small. Now the Internet opens you up to thousands of potential relationships in the supposed safety of your computer. Gambling (like online poker) can be very serious. You no longer need Atlantic City or Las Vegas in order to lose a lot of money - just the privacy of your laptop.

The Internet amplifies our tendencies. If we want to study a subject, it can increase our range of learning. But if you want a lover or seek pornography, it can amplify those drives as well.

Just note that this technology only looks private.Your twelve year old daughter can poke into your email and discover downloaded pornography, to her detriment. And your legal exposure may increase with your online presence. Many matrimonial attorneys will request access to your Facebook or computer in order to show that you are less than wholesome. This may affect custody decisions or how the judge assesses your character.

Advice: When you got the keys to the car at the age of sixteen, seventeen or eighteen, you had taken classes teaching you how to drive and how to avoid problems. Now that you are driving this new technology called the Internet and very few people have learned the rules of the road.

Just know that privacy is an illusion. Do something wrong online and know that someone may find out about it.

Remember, the best mistakes are the one's that you don't make.

Mark R. Banschick, MD

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