Peaceful Divorce

Cynthia Tiano, Esq.'s Blog (31)

How To Get A Divorce The Peaceful Way - Even If Your Ex Is Not On Board!

In my 30 years as a divorce attorney, and especially the last 16 years that I have been a divorce mediator, and now as a counselor, a phrase I have heard very often when I get up on my soapbox about Peaceful Divorce is, “but you don’t know my ex!” or “it’s not possible to have a peaceful divorce in my situation”. Not so. You CAN learn how to get a divorce the peaceful way, whether your spouse or ex is on board right now or not.

Now that may not be what you want to hear because what it…

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Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on May 22, 2012 at 10:00am — 3 Comments

A Peaceful Divorce Begins With You!

Thanks to member Krista Barth, Esq. who has provided this valuable message about how to create and maintain a peaceful divorce when you are a parent.

As a divorce attorney who has been through it myself, a peaceful divorce starts when people do the following:

1. Accept the part you each played in the failure of the marriage (even if the only fault was "picking the wrong partner for your needs.")

2. Lower your expectations… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on April 15, 2010 at 8:00am — 2 Comments

Forgiveness can be a valuable gift in your Divorce

Generously shared by member Rosalind Sedacca, CCT

One of the consequences of a difficult divorce is being left with negative emotions about the experience. Many people struggle with long-term anger, bitterness,

revenge and/or rage following a divorce that they either can't, or choose not

to release.

Are you angry or bitter because you feel wronged by your former… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on April 12, 2010 at 1:00pm — No Comments

The 8-Step Formula for Positive Post-Divorce Parenting: Part 1

Here is another great article from member Rosalind Sedacca, CCT



Parenting after divorce can be complex, frustrating and confusing. However, every day parents around the world are coping with the challenges and raising happy, well-adjusted children. There are many factors that influence your effectiveness as a parent. In this two-part article we'll review some of the major components of the post-divorce parenting success formula.



Step 1: ATTITUDE



Attitude… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on December 11, 2009 at 12:27am — No Comments

Divorcing & Divorced Parents - Keep the Kids out of your Conflict!

Here is another great article from member Rosalind Sedacca, CCT:

When children get caught up in their parent's divorce conflicts, serious problems can develop that must be avoided at all costs. Regardless of your feelings about your ex or soon-to-be-former spouse, it is essential to keep that from your children.

Here are some excellent tips and advice offered by James Roberts, RSW, a licensed social worker in Missouri and Kansas and family therapist in Kansas. Mr. Roberts… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on October 7, 2009 at 11:30am — 1 Comment

4 Divorce Don’ts When Telling the Kids!

Here is a great article by our dear member Rosalind Sedacca, CCT. It's a must read!

* * *

Preparing to break the news to your kids that you’re divorcing their other parent? Feeling insecure about how to broach the subject? Wondering how much to share? How your children will react? How to handle their questions? How to deal with your special circumstances? What the experts suggest?



Well you’re not alone.



Talking about divorce to your children is tough. You… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on August 25, 2009 at 3:00pm — 1 Comment

Peaceful Divorce Model Approved!

The Florida Bar has approved the course proposal submitted by Peaceful Divorce Project, consisting of your very own Peaceful Divorce Members Cynthia Tiano, Esq., Cindy Harari, Esq. and John T. Mulhull III, Esq.



This first course is "Introduction to the Peaceful Divorce Model," an intermediate level course with ethics credit. This means we will be teaching THE LAWYERS about Peaceful Divorce.



We plan to create Peaceful Divorce education and certification programs for… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on July 30, 2009 at 3:30pm — 1 Comment

Making Sound Divorce Decisions

This post was written by member Rosalind Sedacca, founder of Child Centered Divorce Month taking place during the month of July.



Divorce can be very costly -- both physically and emotionally. Join author and divorced mother of four Christina Rowe, founder of ChildSharing, Michelle Muncy and Divorce Financial Analyst Lisa Decker as they share insights about pro-actively planning your divorce to avoid the pitfalls of financial and psychological devastation

-- for you and… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on July 28, 2009 at 3:00pm — No Comments

Nat'l Child-Centered Divorce Month Launched With Free Teleseminars and Gifts for Parents!

Written By Rosalind Sedacca



The third annual National Child-Centered Divorce Month, taking place throughout July, is being launched with a series of complimentary teleseminars and bonus gifts for parents.



Divorce book author, Rosalind Sedacca, CCT, a certified corporate trainer recognized as The Voice of Child-Centered Divorce, initiated National Child-Centered Divorce Month. “These weeks are dedicated to helping parents make the best possible decisions regarding… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on July 3, 2009 at 5:00pm — No Comments

Bashing Your Ex is Bad News for Your Children

Member Rosalind Sedacca, CCT wrote this important post. Please read and pass it on!

****

We all do it from time to time. Make a sarcastic comment about our ex, criticize something they did or didn't do, gesture or grimace our faces when referring to our former spouse. When we do it in front of, near or within hearing distance of our children, we set ourselves up for a hornet's nest of problems.



We have all heard this, but it's easy to forget or let slide. It hurts… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on June 30, 2009 at 9:30am — No Comments

My Peaceful Divorce

Many people have asked me why I turned from being a successful, aggressive divorce attorney to a mediator. It is a question that I have been asked over and over again for a dozen years now. I admit that I never really delved deeply into the question, just answered it with some general statements like, “It was no longer in line with my truth,” or “My spiritual growth would no longer allow me to ignore the damage I was doing to families,” or some such.



Now, to a large extent, these… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on April 4, 2009 at 4:30pm — 5 Comments

Divorce 360 Reviews "Happily Divorced!"

The mega-divorce site, Divorce 360, has reviewed founding member Cynthia Tiano's book and audio program, "Happily Divorced! Secrets of the Win-Win Formula". Here is what they had to say:



"Cynthia Tiano was once considered a "killer" as a divorce attorney. She was respected by fellow attorneys and feared by their clients, who worried what they'd lose when they faced her in divorce court. It wasn't until her own divorce that she began to wonder about her tactics.



"I… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on March 4, 2009 at 5:00pm — No Comments

5 Things Divorcing Parents Should Know

Check out this great article from our member Belinda Rachman, Esq. and please share it with anyone you think it might help!

When you had your child or children your life changed from being focused on yourself to suddenly having to consider how all your life choices would impact the kids. That is the way it should be. What is in the child's best interest should always be a parent's top priority especially when considering divorce.



The first thing you should know is our…

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Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on September 24, 2008 at 7:30am — No Comments

Is Your Divorce Lawyer on Board With A Peaceful Divorce?



I know that divorce lawyers have a pretty bad reputation when it comes to fueling the fires between divorcing couples. Most people believe that they only want to fight, especially since they make more money the longer the fight goes on.

I’m here to tell you as a divorce mediator that this has not really been my experience. Sure, some divorce attorneys prolong the fight, but there really are lots of them out there that do care, and want to help you navigate the…
Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on September 23, 2008 at 10:57am — 1 Comment

Divorce Doesn't Scar Children - Uneducated Parents Do!

Here is a great article by our own Rosalind Sedacca, CCT, founder of ChildCenteredDivorce.com that would benefit everyone to read, and to pass on:

Divorce is a highly emotional topic. When children are involved the consequences are far more dramatic - and, not surprisingly, so are our opinions. I know there are many people who sincerely believe that no divorce is a good divorce. That children are always and inevitably harmed by the physical and emotional separation of their…

Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on September 19, 2008 at 6:30pm — No Comments

Peaceful Divorce Founder will be Interviewed Thursday!

Lisa Fredette, host of the Living Passionately: Getting Beyond Divorce radio show, which airs live every Thursday at 1:00 pm Pacific/4:00 pm Eastern will be interviewing me this Thursday. The topic is How To Create a Peaceful Divorce. Here are the details from Lisa:



Are you or someone you care about facing divorce? Do you want to avoid the inevitable tug of war with your spouse? Do you dread making that call to find an attorney because you just don't want to fight any longer?… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on September 9, 2008 at 1:30pm — No Comments

How do you want your children to feel about you?

Here is a great article written by member Laura Campbell, Divorce Coach. I know you will get as much out of it as I did!

***

I recently had the opportunity to drive home from a weekend away with my two children and spend five hours alone in the car with them. At ages 11 and 14, sometimes our time in the car where no one can walk away, ignore or otherwise avoid conversations, is a wonderful opportunity to really gain valuable insight as to how they are feeling.



I have… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on September 1, 2008 at 6:30pm — 1 Comment

Infidelity: How Do You Tell your Children about the Affair? You Shouldn’t, Experts Say

Our own member Roz Sedacca was recently quoted in a major Divorce 360 article posted here. Read on to see what she has to say, and to learn more about whether or not to tell children about an affair:



When former presidential nominee John Edwards admitted he’d cheated on his wife, the question on some minds was how someone touted as a family man told his wife – and his three children about the affair.



“How do you tell your children about the affair? You don’t,” said… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on August 26, 2008 at 10:18am — 1 Comment

Demi Moore and Bruce Willis Winners of First Annual Celebrity Co-Parent Awards

West Palm Beach, FL: Rosalind Sedacca, CCT, founder of National Child-Centered Divorce Month in July, and Cynthia Tiano, Esq., creator of the Celebrity Co-Parent Awards, have announced that Demi Moore and Bruce Willis are the winners as the Celebrity Co-Parents of the Year at the first annual Celebrity Co-Parent Awards.



“These two parents are ideal role models for families facing the challenges of divorce,” says Sedacca, a Certified Corporate Trainer and author of the… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on July 26, 2008 at 10:00am — 2 Comments

Huge Legal Costs - Not Just For Celebrity Divorces!

Do you have any idea what a celebrity divorce costs? I’m talking about those divorces where the celebrity couple decided to battle it out instead of getting a peaceful divorce!



Check out these numbers - in the McCartney divorce it was reported that Heather Mills ended up over $3million in debt for her legal bills in her divorce battle with Paul McCartney and had to sell her home to pay off her lawyers! David Hasselhoff’s legal fees in his divorce were reputed to be over… Continue

Added by Cynthia Tiano, Esq. on July 9, 2008 at 8:30pm — 1 Comment

Become an affiliate of the Happily Divorced! book and audio program! Let Reformed "Killer" Divorce Attorney, Cynthia Tiano, and Dr. Max Vogt, Marriage and Family Psychologist, take you on an adventure into the lives of two families going through the divorce legal system - one doing "legal battle" and the other creating a "peaceful divorce". Learn how to create a Win-Win from their experiences... HappilyDivorced.org


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Latest Activity

Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

How to Avoid the 10% Penalty When Taking Money From a Defined Contribution Plan!

Normally, distributions made before a participant attains age 59 1/2 are called “early distributions” and are subject to a 10% penalty tax. The tax does not apply, though, to early distributions upon death, disability, annuity payments for the life expectancy of the individual, or distributions made to an ex-spouse by a QDRO.The tax Reg (72)(t)(2)(C) states that when you take money out of a qualified plan in…See More
Aug 15
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

How Can Divorce Affect Your Auto Insurance?

After divorce, people often forget to take care of a few small but very important details, such as:Joint auto Insurance policies;Amending will and life insurance beneficiaries; andSwitching accounts for bills that are on autopay.In regards to auto insurance and divorce, many couples get discounts due to being tied to their residence or having multiple vehicles. When considering the removal of a spouse from a joint policy, compare auto policies before deciding. Keep in mind the following…See More
Jul 27
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

Getting Divorced? Don’t Forget about Long Term Care Insurance!

Often when people go through a divorce, their emotions are tied up. The questions on their mind are “how does this marriage end?” and “what do I get financially?” When they do think about health insurance, they usually don't consider long-term care insurance (LTCi). Why is it so important for recently divorced or currently divorcing couples to think about long term care planning? Two…See More
Jul 5
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

The Grey Divorce

Perhaps you’ve heard about the phenomenon known as the “grey divorce” and are wondering what it’s all about. An important study conducted by the Department of Sociology and the National Center for Family and Marriage Research at Bowling Green State University entitled “The Grey Divorce Revolution” addressed this issue. I was attending the Institute for Divorce Financial Analysts’…See More
Jun 7
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

Elder Care Mediation

I recently attended a conference for The Academy of Professional Family Mediators in Memphis, Tennessee. One of the workshops I participated in was on elder care mediation, which gave some fascinating insights. A 2001 study, done by Debra B. Gentry, showed nearly 40% of adult children providing care for their parents reported serious conflict with siblings, usually related to a lack of sufficient help from those siblings. This study…See More
May 17
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

Parallel Parenting: Making the Best of a Bad Situation

I very much appreciate working on divorce cases with a team, as it has so much value for clients. Mental health professionals can bring much-needed clarity to very difficult situations. The following article, written by Howard Dructman, PhD and Marsha Schechtman, LCSW, Atlanta Behavioral Consultants, explains how the concept of parallel parenting works:A literature…See More
Apr 11
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

Why Do I Have to Prepare a Budget?

We all hate the word budget. How many times have you had a budget that never worked and only made life harder? And when you didn't follow it, did you feel like you failed?If a budget is done right, it will provide many benefits that are crucial when going through a divorce.A budget is a guideline to help you forecast how your cash flow will look.Having a budget keeps your priorities and values straight. Many…See More
Mar 23
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

The Difference Between Litigation and Mediation: It's Personal

People have a range of preconceptions about divorce, the law, and the courts. In reality, going before a judge to air your grievances about your soon-to-be ex-spouse is rarely as satisfying as movies and television shows may have you believe. Mediation offers a private, cost-efficient alternative to litigation—but before you choose either venue, there are some guiding principles to keep in mind:Don't expect…See More
Mar 7
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

The Taxes They Are A-Changing

Time flies when you’re having fun; here we find ourselves in a new year, with new challenges ahead—and of course our taxes are due. So let’s bring you up to date on some tax changes that we know of. (Remember this year could bring other tax changes that we don’t know about at this time).One big change is that 1099s have to be in to the IRS by January 31st of his…See More
Feb 7
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

Social Security: How Do the New Rules Affect Divorced People?

The Association of Divorce Financial Planners held their annual conference this past October. One of the keynote speakers was Mary Beth Franklin, CFP, who is a contributing editor for Investment News. She spoke about the new Social Security rules and how to maximize benefits. Here is part of her talk relating to divorce:If married at least 10 years and currently unmarried, you may be able to collect on your ex-spouse’s work record as…See More
Dec 29, 2016
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

The Association of Divorce Financial Planners’ 2016 Divorce Catalyst Conference

I recently attended The Association of Divorce Financial Planners 2016 Divorce Catalyst Conference, held from October 27-29. There were a number of excellent speakers and interesting topics presented over the three days: Day OneThe keynote speaker was Jeff Brend. Jeff is an attorney who specializes in family law and is a fellow of the American Academy of…See More
Nov 23, 2016
Robert D. Bordett, CFP, CDFA posted a blog post

Self-Executing Modifications: Six Things Everyone Should Know

One of the things I have learned over the years is that I cannot be a Jack-of-all-trades and a master-of-none. In today’s ever-changing world, we need to have connections with professionals in other disciplines and specialties. This is especially true working in the divorce area.In the past, it was the attorney’s job to do everything. Today divorcing…See More
Oct 27, 2016

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