Every member of this site has their own unique message around the issue of Peaceful Divorce. When we each share the piece that we have with one another, we can put the puzzle together! Please share with us what your mission and your message is!
My goal is to send the message to families and family lawyers that ending a marriage does not end a relationship. I have learned over the years that often the parties are not the problem, their lawyers create a war-like atmosphere. If more lawyers sent the message of peaceful divorce to their clients the healing could begin and the battles would end. I have worked in this field for many years and I believe that slowly the understanding is coming across that peace begins in the home and we as professionals must cultivate this peace not destroy it.
So true, Richard. Only the lawyers seem to benefit from the divorce war since more fighting generates more fees. Is that what it's all about for the lawyers? I'm not so sure. I am seeing what you are -- more professionals are beginning to understand that there is a better way.
As you mentioned in an earlier post, education is key in so many ways. One missing link is co-parent education. No one needs any special training to be a parent and here (in Florida) divorcing parents are required to take only a 4-hour parenting class. It's challenging to be a parent in an "intact" family; even more so to be a divorced (single, re-married, or step) parent.
We have the opportunity to send the message -- families are forever. If divorce is inevitable, let's make it peaceful!
July, once again, is National Child-Centered Divorce Month. Let's take advantage of this opportunity to speak out in unison on this important topic. Let's make noise about the growing need for co-parent education and also appeal to all divorce professionals to join our campaign promoting the advantages of "peaceful divorce."
Please join me in planning our campaign in advance so we're prepared nation-wide to attract media attention to our purpose, while growing our numbers amongst all divorce professionals and related associations.
Contact me at email@example.com to discuss all this in greater detail.
In order to change the hostile environment that accompanies diviorce or separation, anyone involved needs to feel that there is something better outside the relationship than existed inside the relationship. The lack of acceptance of what is leads to much of the frustration and the loss of possibility for so many in losing a partner . With a Spiritual Divorce, one sees the wisdom of the universe, creates a new and more inspiring and empowering possibility for themselves, and welcomes rather then resists the change inherent on separation and divorce. For many, accepting a relatonship is over is impossible so divorce becomes the battleground to hold on rather than healing and letting go. It is only when we realize we would never enter the relationship as it is and are attached to how it was that we can avoid the ugliness of a confrontational divorce. It is about healing the emotional wounds before you try to separate and not engaging in being right. When we give up the need to be right, divorce is easy and a natural path.
You are a messenger of peace on earth and the Spiritual Divorce work you do is the key to healing the heart and opening to peace individually and on earth. Our outer world is only a reflection of our inner and the Collective Shadows manifesting in our culture shouts about the need for healing the heart and dealing with all that is denied and shut off in our humanity. All that is available in the Spiritual Divorce work we do. It is beautiful!
Thanks for those excellent descriptions of what "peaceful divorce" offers to both sides of the splitting couple. I would like to use your words in an upcoming ezine article focused on that very concept.
I believe too many couples have never considered or been exposed to a consciousness that sees "gifts" in the divorce process or alternatives that might truly be peaceful and supportive. As our work spreads I know more and more souls will resonate with this message and make more "conscious" choices regarding all their relationship and divorce challenges.
My mission is to provide divorcing couples and couples who are about to marry with a forum in which to peacefully resolve issues they have concerning their marriage or impending marriage and their children. In a neutral setting, couples have the opportunity to discuss options and come up with mutually acceptable solutions with the assistance of myself, as the mediator, and a financial neutral. I utilize a multi-disciplinary mediation approach, facilitative, evaluative and transformative, to help the participants focus on the issues, while providing them with the opportunity to explain their positions.
Become an affiliate of the Happily Divorced! book and audio program! Let Reformed "Killer" Divorce Attorney, Cynthia Tiano, and Dr. Max Vogt, Marriage and Family Psychologist, take you on an adventure into the lives of two families going through the divorce legal system - one doing "legal battle" and the other creating a "peaceful divorce". Learn how to create a Win-Win from their experiences... HappilyDivorced.org
One of the guiding values in mediation and collaborative law is transparency. It comes with the territory when one is trying to establish trust with two different parties. Sometimes an issue may arise that one party may wish not to discuss in front of the other. If they both agree, separate meetings may take place. These meetings are called caucuses.Caucuses can be…See More
I think everyone’s least favorite word is BUDGET. Why don’t we want to hear that word? Think about it: We’re asking ourselves to do something we don’t want to do — or worse yet, someone else is asking us to do it. While we might not like them, having a budget does help. In divorce planning — whether you are going to litigation,…See More
I remember when the default custody arrangement had one parent as the custodial parent, and the other parent was known as the “Disneyland parent.” They had their children every other weekend, and maybe once during the week for dinner. Today it is more common to see joint parenting time consist of one week on, and one week off or “two-two-five-five” time,…See More
Very often, couples who are divorcing amicably, or who have straightforward financial situations, will forgo meeting with a financial professional while they go through mediation. Though this may seem logical on its face, “going it alone” may result in unnecessary hardship and inaccurate calculations. It is easy to simply look at a tax table today and say “I am going…See More
Going through divorce means dealing with hundreds of details, some more important than others. One detail that merits extra contemplation is how to deal with the marital home.Does one spouse want to keep it because the children still live there? You don't want to disrupt their lives any more than is already happening. What if the children are grown? Do you still need that much of a house?Here are the three most common means of dealing with the house in divorce:Selling the house and dividing the…See More